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Insecurity – Experienced and Expressed

by on November 24, 2014

 

Insecurity – Ways in which it can be experienced and expressed
Insecure people tend to make relationships with other insecure people. They typically express bad behavior. They also tend to accept bad behavior foisted upon them. They tend to feel helpless to change.

Insecure people who have out-going personalities typically become controllers. They surround themselves with other insecure people who are more quiet and reserved. Those people feel helpless to leave the controlling situation. Their insecurity is reinforced by association with insecure people who are controllers.

Some insecure people who are less out-going will hide in the ‘security’ of a powerful person. Most of the time the powerful person is also very insecure and is using/controlling other insecure people to make him/her self feel ‘secure’.

The sadness is that insecurity feeds on itself. These people hold confident people at arm’s length. They reject the obvious help that is all around them. They make life nearly impossible for safe, confident, healthy, people. In fact, they see confidence as arrogance and pride. Such is the power and sadness of insecurity.

Typical indications/characteristics of insecure people of various personality types
Over prepared to react and/or protect
Gushingly kind and caring initially, but controlling and abusive later
Are threatened by confident people
Controllers – internally out of control so try to control everything outside of self
Pretenders – maintaining images
Perfectionists – feel guilty because they cannot be perfect
Powerful – dangerous controllers
Introverted – controlled by fears
Self-centered thoughts and behaviors
Cannot feel other’s pain
Hate self and project that self-hatred on others
Allow others to abuse and misuse them
Use overt sexuality as a mask for insecurity
Fear of discovery of lack of perfection, ability, etc.
Reject love and so need to control or be controlled to feel needed
Not feel worthy of love or care so they allow abuse to happen
Use defensiveness and masks and bravado to keep people away
Spiritual blindness resulting from allowing sinful people to control them
Lack of wisdom resulting from being easily persuaded by controllers
Surround self with people who are easily manipulated and want to be manipulated
Hurt others before they can be hurt to stay in control and to keep others off balance
Sabotage relationships to stay in control – ‘I will end this before you can end it’
Do not always realize what they are doing
Live conditionally without commitment
Make others feel guilty
Accept love conditionally
Do not really believe in unconditional love
Do not believe anyone could love them unconditionally
Always doubt any love that is offered to them
Feel threatened by anyone who expresses care for another person
Never believe they are good enough
Allow others to make their decisions for them
Allow others to do their thinking for them.
Easily manipulated
Insecurity can be masked by many kinds of behaviors
The one common denominator of wrong behavior is insecurity
The one common denominator of bullies is insecurity

From → Christian Living

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