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Christian Maturity – Part II – The Adults in the Room

by on August 10, 2018

The Adults in the Room – concept

In every situation in life, maturity is critically needed. Persons with a high level of maturity are sometimes referred to as the ‘Adults in the Room.’
Who is the adult in the room? It is the person who can determine the wisest course of action and pursue it in the best manner. These people are so needed and there are never enough of them to bless and direct the other persons.

Typically each situation has three groups of people:
1. Supporters on one side,
2. Detractors on the other side,
3. Followers in the middle.
The Adult must empower the supporters and marginalize the detractors so the middle group can follow the Adult and the supporters. Why must it be that way? The detractors are typically the loudest group but most of the time they are not sure what needs to happen, much less how to make it happen. They typically do not have the courage to move ahead with wisdom but do have the boldness to challenge the Adults/leaders.

Sometimes the ‘detractors’ are correct. In that case they need adults in the room to provide the direction for the path of truth to be known and followed. In this case the adults must be especially strong and stable.

Adults must be able to tell the difference between the truth and fiction that is presented as the truth. They can tell the difference between truth and what others may be calling truth. When someone is confronted with truth but they claim that they are being mistreated – adults can tell the difference.

Personal characteristics of ‘Adults’
Confident in truth
Adequate wisdom and understanding
Self aware
Self control
Knowledge of lenses through which to view situations
Knowledge of personal limits
Awareness of surroundings
Flexible enough to entertain other’s views
Genuine love for people
Spiritually strong
Emotionally healthy
Patient at the right time
Know when to say ‘no’
Know how to say ‘no’

Leadership characteristics of ‘Adults’
Able to inspire
Able to engage
Able to see and understand the big picture
Able to communicate effectively
Able to assess personalities
Able to access abilities
Able to bring people to focus on opportunity
Able to process fairly
Able to protect the innocent
Able to hold the guilty accountable
Able to apply appropriate principles
Able to create a team with purpose
Able to communicate effectively
Able to utilize individual gifts
Able to encourage
Able to stand alone for what is right
Enough history to bring history to the present situation
Able to avoid polarization and escalation
Avoid use of power unless absolutely required

Characteristics of immaturity
Selfishness – even when they try to appear as servants
Anger – when other methods do not work
Dishonesty – with convincing lies
Defensive – with convincing logic
Demanding – with convincing drama
Pouty – the perfect ruse
Gossip – to polarize a group
Controlling – by what ever means available
Controlled – by misunderstandings
Martyr complex – ‘everybody is against me’

Who are the Adults in the Room in the Bible?
They are the Daniels, the Josephs, the Esthers, the Deborahs and all the unnamed men and women who stood above the low life of following sin and wrong ways of living. They paid the price of obedience to God. Nehemiah was the classic adult. No allurement or threat changed the focus that God had placed in his heart.

Who are the Adults in the Room today?

The adults are those who are filled with and are obedient to the Holy Spirit of our God. They are not controlled by the drama around them. They maintain integrity and purity and genuine love in the face of whatever Satan throws against the Church of Jesus Christ in this day.

God is calling persons like that today.
Maybe He is calling you to be one of them?


From → Christian Living

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